So, let’s talk about the silent weight of grief—especially as it surfaces during the holiday season when everyone else seems to be celebrating…
Coping with grief is a deeply personal experience that’s often misunderstood by many. Contrary to others’ belief, there’s no one-size-fits-all approach to healing. It is a highly individualized process that for a lot of people, moving forward happens differently.
Unfortunately, this often goes unacknowledged, leading some individuals to feel pressured to move on quickly. This is because, as those around them may suggest, others seem to have already done so.
But regardless of intent, it shouldn’t be like that. There shouldn’t be a shot clock dictating how long one has to—or not to—grieve.
That’s why in this episode, we’ll cover how grief impacts each of us uniquely, why it’s okay to still feel the weight of loss long after others have moved on, and why moving forward doesn’t mean leaving our memories or feelings behind.
Whether you find yourself navigating grief or supporting a loved one who is, this episode serves as a reminder that people should be allowed to cope with grief—at their own pace.
Why you need to check this episode:
– Learn how grief impacts us differently and why there is no “one-size-fits-all” approach to processing loss;
– Understand the complexities of grieving for someone with dementia, where the loss is emotional and mental rather than physical; and
– Recognize the importance of allowing yourself to cope without pressure or a timeline, embracing grief as an evolving experience
“I want us to understand that coping with the grief isn’t a death sentence. It is something that we are allowed to move forward with, it is something that we are allowed to have to live with us, and it is something that we’re allowed to not have a shot clock. The shot clock can be turned off when it comes time to grief.” – Dr. Berry Pierre
Topics Covered:
00:00 – Introduction: The individualized nature of coping with grief
00:52 – A Weight Lifted: Emphasis on the significance of asking if someone is coping with grief
01:26 – Personal Patient Experience: A patient shares her struggle with grief and the importance of feeling heard and validated
03:20 – Permission Not Required: The importance of letting people feel the way they feel and not pressuring them to “move on” quickly
05:28 – Understanding Grief Beyond Loss: Grief related to dementia and the loss of a loved one’s identity
06:24 – Men and Grief: Insight into how men process grief differently, often influenced by societal norms
07:44 – Not a Death Sentence: How being a different person during and after a loss is completely normal
09:26 – Encouraging Conversations: The importance of asking if someone is coping well with their grief and seeking help if needed
Quotes:
“There [are] no books out there that says what’s the appropriate time that we should be getting over things. We have to understand that for a lot of people, getting over things is going to happen in different ways.” – Dr. Berry Pierre
“Whether it be talking with a good support system like a friend or family member, or if you have access to talk with a counselor, there’s certain systems, certain processes, certain ways that we can kind of help people move through all of these stages…That way may not be a one size fits all…but understand that there is a route.” – Dr. Berry Pierre
“If you’re coping with it and you’re living with it and you’re moving forward with it, we’re going in the right direction. But if it’s debilitating, if it’s handicapping, [or] if it’s making it so that you can’t do the things you need to do, this is when I think you need some help.” – Dr. Berry Pierre
“I don’t want the grief to succumb. I want us to be able to cope with it, live with it, and move forward with it.” – Dr. Berry Pierre
Mentions:
- How to Deal with the Unexpected with Niesia Garza, LCSW
- Grief and Dementia Together with Niesia Garza MSW, LCSW
- Niesia Garza, LCSW
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